Kansas City Freelance Writer Liz Craig

For the past 10 years, I’ve been calling myself a freelance writer. But recently, a friend who is cognizant of the kind of counseling I give my clients, suggested that “writer” is a bit limiting.

It’s true that I can write, and am, in fact, “a writer.” “Senior Writer” is the title by which I’ve been known in the ad agency world. But, as anyone who has worked at an agency, or as a freelancer, can tell you, there’s more to the job of writing than pulling out a computer and banging out some random letters. There’s the whole “thinking” part, for instance, which the title, “Writer,” doesn’t address.

By way of explaining this to a foreign client who was unfamiliar with the process and wondered what I had been billing him for, since he hadn’t seen his campaign yet, I drew a picture of an iceberg (I do have some artistic skills, but anyone can draw a triangle.). I drew the waterline close to the tip.

Then I explained that all the background info gathering, analyzing, thinking, strategizing, getting bids, estimating, budgeting and planning were in the part below the waterline. You can’t see them. The part you finally see, the finished project, is the very tip of the iceberg. You have to pay for all of that, just as you have to pay for an architect’s plans before you build your house.

My client’s question brought to mind the image of a dad-to-be looking at his third-trimester-pregnant wife and saying, “You’ve been saying for months that you’re going to have a baby. I don’t see any baby. So what gives?”

But getting back to services I offer clients: beyond simply writing, I do project management.

Harried business owners don’t have the time, energy or knowledge to manage graphic designers, webmasters, HTML experts, and others involved in a Web or other project. So if they turn the project over to me, let me communicate and negotiate with the other suppliers, then report to them, they save a lot of time, which equates to money. Not to mention that they avoid the anguish of trying to get business, do business, AND manage a marketing or advertising project.

Managing a project in print or Web or video for a client is child’s play, compared with my duties as an ad agency writer/producer. In that capacity, I was in charge of every aspect of a production, from keeping the client happy (Number One, always) to producing estimates to riding herd on the production company, casting talent, directing same, selecting wardrobe set designs, keeping costs in line, and overseeing anything else that would affect the final product.

So, since I help clients as a consultant, thinker, planner, strategist and project manager, what do I call myself? Would a rose by any other name really smell as sweet? Or would another name make me smell sweeter? If I give up “writer” and go for the more accurate “independent marketing and advertising consultant,” will people actually know what I can do? Hmm. I changed it on LinkedIn. Let’s see what happens.

Back in my agency days, our clients were large corporations who had CFOs and accounting departments taking care of their books. Today, as a freelance writer in Kansas City, I’m often trying to help small business owners whose staff is limited to a handful of people. And maybe they don’t have an accountant, or even Quickbooks to keep them on track.

When small business owners ask me, “Can you give us a business plan?” I have to say, “That’s not my specialty,” and refer them to the Kansas Small Business Development Center. There’s one office located at Johnson County Community College, in case you’re interested.

The KSBDC is a largely unknown entity funded by the State of Kansas specifically to help small businesses get their act together.

They have counselors and advisors there who can help you see where you are, where you want to go, and how to get there. Their help could range from helping you create a business plan to figuring out how to drive more traffic to your website.

I’ve referred two small business owners there. One has gone to classes there to learn about business plans, marketing his business, and more. The other is still too busy doing his own business to take time out and go to the KSBDC for advice.

That’s a problem for small business owners. Many are not only doing whatever it is their business is about, but also trying to run their business, from accounting to maintenance to marketing.

I can’t help you with accounting or maintenance, but I can help you find the right person to help you with them. I know a QuickBooks pro, for example, who helped one client see the financial landscape of his business for the first time in 15 years.

And as far as marketing your business goes, if you’re a small business person, that’s just one thing at which you’re not a whiz that you may be trying to do yourself. You justify it by saying if you do it, it won’t cost you money. But is that really true?

If you generally charge clients $75 per hour for a service call (let’s say), and you spend five hours on a marketing effort, well, you’ve just cost yourself $375!

Why not let me help you with advertising, Web copy, brochures, or any other marketing effort you need? When you pay me the $75, you can be out earning the money to pay for it. And you’ll be a lot less frazzled by trying to do something that isn’t second nature to you.

If I can help you with writing, strategizing, researching or implementing your online, print or broadcast marketing plan, just give me a call at 913.236.7595. I’ll be glad to meet with you and see what you need and find a way to get it done.

If you’re looking for a freelance writer, take a look at me. Or rather, some of my work. It’s on this very website, under “Portfolio.” But look, I’m more than the projects I’ve done for clients, see? I have had a life outside of work. A fun life. You won’t see this in my bio, but during my UMKC days, I was involved with a comedy improvisation company (maybe the first in KC).

During a riotous year working with the improv group, I wrote satirical songs (good practice for jingles later), sketches (good practice for TV scripts later), and acted as assistant director and emcee (good practice for life later). I had a ball and made lifelong friends.

But back to the career… Starting out with a degree in Radio & TV Writing/Production, my first job was in advertising. For several years, I worked on new product development and advertising, learning lots from marketing directors of Fortune 500 companies. I got to use my radio and TV commercial skills at that first job, then eventually moved to Omaha to work at Bozell. The less said about that the better. I was lucky enough to be hired by another Omaha agency, not a big one like Bozell, but home to most of the biggest clients in town. A great small agency with a staff of fabulous small people. And one mean 6’7″ art director.

Soon after I got to Omaha, I felt the lure of the footlights again, so I pursued community theater acting. My first role was as the title character in “I Remember Mama.” Wow. That was a nightmare, with dozens (it seemed) of wardrobe changes and no prop or wardrobe person. The Swedish accent was the least of my challenges!

I did a whole lot of radio and TV work at the Omaha agency for 10 years. Our clients were retailers, hospitals, car dealers, supermarkets, a pizza chain, more hospitals, and Ak-Sar-Ben race track, for which I got to write and produce a series of TV spots featuring Jack Klugman, who is quite a horseman. I’ll tell you, he is a swell guy, but he really gets grumpy when you try to feed him blueberry bagels (Oy!) at 6 a.m., which was 4 a.m. his time, LA time.

The Ak-Sar-Ben account was mine, and I loved it because I’d ridden horses back home in Mexico, Missouri, “Saddlehorse Capital of the World.” I wrote and produced 60-second radio commercials featuring educational bits about horse racing. Like, “What are those things jockeys put underneath the horses’ saddles?” (Answer: weights) Then I got homesick for Kansas City and came back. After relatively brief stints at three good writing jobs, I became a Kansas City freelance writer in 2001. So here I am.

The improv company wasn’t the end of my love of humor. When clients would let me, I’ve injected it into projects. I created two animated French pizza chefs in TV spots, humorous greeting cards for college students, Omaha Visitors and Convention Bureau TV spots (One featured a guy dressed up as a potato, saying how your company won’t be treated like small potatoes if you have your convention or meeting in Omaha. Okay, maybe that’s really not the best example. Take a listen to my radio spots, under “Portfolio.”).

In my advertising and marketing life, I’ve done ads, brochures, catalog copy, direct mail, billboards, bus benches (Don’t laugh; they’re a big deal in Omaha.), window signs, radio and TV commercials, video promos, articles and advertorials. There must be some other stuff, too, but I can’t remember it all.

These days, of course, like every other advertising or marketing person in Kansas City (and around the world), I’m involved with social media and Web writing. Also, surprisingly enough, I’m doing professional proofreading for a giant investment company. Looking as professional as you are is important, companies are beginning to find out, and that means sending out communications that are properly punctuated and spelled. I had hoped the pain of diagramming sentences in school would pay off eventually. But really, who knew that much later, a lot of people wouldn’t be able to tell a noun from an onion? That used to be the province of “secretaries.” Guess what? Everyone’s their own secretary now, since computers.

Well, enough of this. If you’re looking for an experienced freelance writer in Kansas City, you’ve come to the right spot. I’ve won awards, both in Kansas City and in Omaha, but I’m more about winning business for clients. Give me a call at 913.236.7595 if that sounds good to you. Or invite me to your place to put on an improv demonstration.

I look forward to talking with you and working with you.

Before I tell you my fave spots, let me register my discontent with the eagerly anticipated (by me) e*trade baby spot.

Unlike the edgy, irreverent baby in the “Golf” spot (Love that kid!), this baby was downright cuddly and sweet. He told how he and his tailor (!), a nice old Italian gentleman (Antonio!), were both doing well on e*trade and ended by patting him on the cheek and shushing him with a chubby forefinger.

NO! The baby’s gotta have edge! I call this commercial epic fail! Are we so sensitized to name-calling and rudeness now that we can’t use them for comic purposes? Shame, because there goes half of the comedy lexicon.

Others in the ad world think differently (the dummies who tapped the Bud Light spots as the best), but to my mind, the VW commercials were light-years ahead of the rest. And the best VW commercial was “The Force,” starring a tyke in a Darth Vader costume trying his Force on exercise machinery, the dog, even a baby doll, all to no avail. The kid is really bummed ’til his dad helps him out by secretly starting the Passat in the driveway via a remote starter. Funny, charming, and effective. Who could ask for anything more?

Often, I come across a minor proofreading glitch in the Kansas City Star. But seldom does the Star misspell a headline in 40-point type. It’s like screaming “I’m an idiot!” Take a look at this monstrous blunder which appeared in the Green Bay Press-Gazette recently.

After writing on consumer packaged goods accounts at ad agencies for years, I think I understand the concept of “brand” pretty well. It’s more than a logo, it’s the promise a product stands for. What I have a harder time getting is how branding extends to your own person.

Marketers used to adopt spokespeople, animals or things to represent the fine qualities of their canned goods, frozen food, air conditioning units or what-have-you. Their product brand’s virtues. The Unique Selling Propositions.

• In consumer packaged goods, you had Mr. Clean, that handsome brute in white, representing the ultimate cleanliness you could achieve by using the product.

• Ajax laundry detergent was “stronger than dirt,” championed by a knight on a white horse as a jingle drilled the key phrase into our heads.

• The Jolly Green Giant was friendly, green and out standing in his field (sorry for the pun). He represented garden-fresh vegetables in cans or frozen. Ho ho ho!

• Poppin’ Fresh was a literal dough boy representing dough that popped out of a can when you rapped it on the edge of the counter. The name is ingenious — the unique selling proposition in two words — and the spokesdough unforgettable. But for me, the little guy was too cutesy, especially when he giggled. I wanted that finger that poked him in the tum-tum to poke all the way through. Am I the only one? I am? Okay.

• The Keebler elves are gently mischievous and fun. The adorable little cartoon people appeal to kids, who beg their parents to buy the cookies. But since the parents grew up with the elves, it’s not too hard a sale. That’s the power of a strong brand with an appealing image that remains consistent over time. A quality product doesn’t hurt, either.

The point of all this is, I understand conveying a product’s qualities via a brand symbol of some kind. What I don’t get very well is how to do this “personal branding” thing for myself.

What if I adopted a spokesthing to represent me? No, that’s so yesterday. R.I.P. Charlie the Tuna, Reddy Electric and Speedy Alka-Seltzer. Besides, what kind of animal or other creature would represent a writer? A mole who digs for just the right phrase? A brain whose frontal lobe lights up like a Christmas tree, to represent creative ideas sparking? A pen that flies? A computer with a thought bubble? Naah. To build a personal brand today, you use different tactics.

Oddly enough, a personal brand today is something you construct, not in person, but through social media. I just read an article about “7 Ways to Start Building Your Personal Brand for Free.” These suggestions sound helpful. But in the advertising or marketing business, at least, there’s no substitute for getting to know people. In person, not online.

Social media “personal branding” tactics can be a helpful part of your overall strategy. But it’s important also to get out and get to know people, either in networking groups, industry meetings or social settings. If the only close relationship you have is with your computer, that’s not good.

There’s an old sales formula that still is valid: people have to Know, Like and Trust you before they give you business. Just makes sense, doesn’t it?

Nothing will put a bad product out of business faster than a good advertising campaign. Advertising causes people to try a product once, but poor quality eliminates any possibility of a repeat purchase.”
–Morris Hite, member, Advertising Hall of Fame

In case you hadn’t noticed, distrust and mistrust are at an all-time high in our great country. Not just among Tea Partiers, either. The citizenry at large are grumbling and muttering. They’re discontented with the way things are and they distrust the people who are running things.

Goldman Sachs, the Pope, the government, the courts, preachers and politicians, local school boards, the police department — all of them are suspect these days. And not entirely without cause. But who ever thought such a crabby, suspicious mood would extend toward products and brands? Advertisers, afraid to rile already angry consumers, are putting out bland, inoffensive messages, just to be safe.

“Safe” and “effective” generally don’t go together where advertising is concerned. But these are peculiar times.

When you think about it, with public figures’ statements and product messages trying to lead us on every day, is it a wonder branding is dead, or at least gravely ill? I don’t think so. And that may even be a good thing.

When lying and puffery fail to attract buyers, brands (and politicians, though I wouldn’t hold my breath) may begin to deliver on higher quality. Products will incorporate more “green” methods and packaging. And create a better customer experience.

Or marketers may retreat from product benefits and go the superficial way of “design” as a differentiator. Nothing wrong with that, except that it doesn’t give you a better product, just a cooler-looking package and a higher price tag.

Where does this all lead? Perhaps in the near future, to greater simplicity.

Remember when “branding” was simple, before the dawn of sophisticated marketing requiring a squadron of MBAs and creative artists to develop? It used to be, you got a good product? Tell what’s good about it for the consumer. Branding done. Maybe the company owner and a couple of guys in a back office figured it out.

I guess I yearn for the simple days (way before my time, and even my parents’) when crackers came in a barrel, and nothing went through focus group testing. If people bought it, it succeeded. If not, it didn’t.

Today’s consumer is much more hard-nosed and wary than the eager homemaker of the 50s. Then, in that golden time after WWII, everything seemed hopeful, bright and shiny. New labor-saving devices were invented to help the housewife lighten her burden. There was really something new and improved to talk about.

Today, in a darker political and economic climate, with shelves crowded with parity products clamoring for attention, marketers must re-assess the value of the products and services they sell to consumers who are pinching pennies and worried about the future. You can’t sell “fluffy” or “fun” products to people who are hunkering down (except for chocolate or very inexpensive “cheap thrill” items).

As always, marketing and “branding” will adapt to the new reality. What form that adaptation will take is anyone’s guess. My hope is that the clutter of marginal brands will disappear, and the best and strongest brands will remain. In a rational world, that’s what *should* happen, anyway.

Here’s an interesting food-for-thought article from Rance Crane, of Advertising Age, which inspired this blog post. Take a look. Let me know what you think.

“I never let my schooling interfere with my education.”

If you’re like me, you get dozens of e-mails, newsletters and notices in your Inbox every day. You’re on every social media vehicle, from LinkedIn to Plaxo to Twitter and Facebook. I have at least three e-mail accounts, and I write three blogs. Does it ever get to you? I mean, all the “keeping up with” you have to do?

Well, it gets to me.

You can’t not be on these things, but dang, they’re time-suckers. A person has to have time to do paying work, not just check the Inbox every 20 minutes to delete messages to avoid being buried in e-mail. And these are messages I WANTED. Like the NY Times twice-daily news update. Twitter messages (If Guy Kawasaki doesn’t quit tweeting, I’m dropping him.). Minutes from a meeting. Stuff I need to pay attention to.

But as I was saying, if you’re like me, you may be fed up with social media. I’m a Boomer, so I figure there must be millions of other Boomers who are fed up, too.

Here’s my prediction for 2011: Enough people will be fed up with social media that they’ll start meeting face-to-face with friends, family and clients. Yes. It will come to that.

Remember that old out-of-fashion thing called “conversation?” Not tweets or e-mails or Facebook blurbs? but an ongoing exchange of verbal messages, accompanied by real facial expressions instead of emoticons, conducted while the parties thereto are in the same room?

I have hundreds of “friends” on all these social media, but how often do I do friend things with them? Almost never. Unless I go to a Meetup, another social media-driven thing. I joined a Board Games Meetup, and if I ever go, it should be real person-to-person fun.

In 2011, when social media dies and F2F becomes the new thing, remember you heard it here first.